Wake up, Wake up...

This past Sunday was one of those days where you look out in the crowd and just want to scream... "Wake up! We're here to worship the Living God Jesus Christ!" It didn't help that it was dark, grey and cold outside (I actually dig that kind of weather, but I think most people get lethargic). To me, it is so frustrating when you sit down with God to receive direction for Sunday mornings, only to find that people are less than enthused to go there with you.

Do I not have those mornings myself...of course I do. But how is it that you get 200 adults in a room together and 90% of them feel that same way on the same day? Then I look at the way we planned the morning and wonder...did we miss God here? OR...did our people miss God? Were we so complacent to whet our appetite for Him that we grew content to let moment by moment pass without pursuing Him? Why are we so prone to do that? Why do I find myself in other worship environments staring at the musicians saying "Play for me...show me what you got!" Instead, my heart should be saying "God, show us what You’ve got! We want to see You in all Your splendor and glory...knowing that we'll be forever changed by Your greatness!"

So back to this past Sunday...from a purely musical perspective. Did we as a team inhibit our people from worshiping? I can't say for sure...it was a strong morning on both the musical and sound sides. There were some minor errors, but nothing that I would characterize as distracting. We did dive into two hymns that morning...sometimes that causes people to be a bit less involved. But they were great versions of the songs, so shouldn't have hurt it too much.

Could it be that people are actually worshiping and being affected by the presence of God without any outward display of affection for Him? Often times when I have services like we had on Sunday, I will get numerous comments about how people "really connected with God." To that I want to counter... "what service were you in?" Then I realize, I have to trust the sovereignty of our God...he is moving on people's hearts in ways that I can't understand. Especially here in suburbia where people seem to be highly conscious of how they are perceived...I find people are less likely to express demonstratively what's going on their hearts.

So was Sunday a success or a failure...well, I imagine God was worshiped and people were moved to think about their lives in light of His Kingdom. In that regards, it was a success. However, I am also unsatisfied with where we are...I want our people to know the One we cannot fathom...and then respond appropriately. Louie Giglio says "we have tinny tiny worship because we have a tinny tiny God." I pray that wouldn't be true of us. I want to worship a huge God, One beyond comprehension.

So here we go again...another week. Another chance for us to encounter Him. I will set my face like flint, and I know that I will not be put to shame.

Where's My Dependence?

Where's my Dependence? I am in a state of wonder today...I look at the worship team God has blessed me with. It's amazing...yet, I am potentially losing 3 key players on my team, all around the same time. God has brought other people our way, but when I think about these people leaving, my stomach begins to turn.

So I wonder, why do I feel sick when I think about these changes? Are their departures such that my team will be crippled? Yes and no. The team will take a blow on the musical side, but our resolve to lead people to genuine encounters with Christ will be intact. In that, where is my dependence? Do I place my dependence on great musicians, or do I put my complete trust in the Creator of this universe. Once again, I revisit a sore spot in my leadership...am I more dependent on my musicians to provide an experience with God or am I depending on God to show up and do what only He can?

I believe God will continue to keep refining me in this area. Everytime I lose a key player on my worship team, my soul cringes. My tendency is to think, how will we continue to do what we do without them? I believe my question needs to be, what is God doing? How will God choose to move through my new set of external circumstances. When we meet for corporate worship on Sundays, He still desires the worship of His people. If worship is more than just music, which I believe it is, then it should remain unhindered despite the changes. In fact, I wonder if true Biblical worship will grow? Regardless of how slick the presentation on Sunday, is God moving in such a way that people are responding with acts of worship that far supercede hands raised in the air? Are they living their lives sacrificially as acts of worship? Am I doing that? Do I love my wife sacrificially? Do I lay down my all for my family? Do I honor God with my money...where's my treasure...there's my heart! If people were living their lives according to Romans 12 because they've had an indescribable experience with Jesus Christ, Sundays would just be an overflow a life they already lead. There would be no "modeling from the stage" necessary; we would just all come blown away with who God is. We'd walk in the door praising God...shouting His name...telling of His greatness.

So that brings me back to my first question...where's my dependence? Am I once again depending on the strengths of man that are certain to fail? Am I leaning into the divine strength that comes from a mighty God that is out to make much of His name? His river runs strong...sometimes I think I am just content to stand ankle deep and say, "oh the water feels nice." He calls us to jump in head first, get lost in the current, take a drink...heck get drunk on who He is! When will we worship with the abandonment that God desires? Why are we content to sit on the banks where the water is calm and shallow? God is deep...yet we worship like He's the little stream of water that runs by the curb of my house when we have a light shower.

I want to place my dependence in the One whose current is strong...an unstoppable force...not bound by human effort, but far exceeding our best offerings.

To Talk or Not to Talk...

Talking...that's the subject of my first blog. I've been leading worship for 10 years now and have always dealt with the quandary of talking during times of musical worship. Have you ever been in a service where you feel like you get two sermons back to back? The worship guy stands up there and has some sort of cliché intro for every song...or stops in the middle of a set to give his own 10 minute sermonette. That's usually the time I start counting lights on the ceiling or conveniently step out to grab a cup of coffee (what church doesn't offer at least coffee now).

As a worship pastor, I am typically pretty emphatic about not talking during the musical worship time. I'm not saying that you never say anything...I'm just referring to instances like above. Over the years though, I've noticed that the people I pastor begin to wonder...can the guy even talk? I do a fair amount of prompting during songs to help our people stay engaged and occasionally will say something short to intro a song, but for the most part, I leave the talking to the talking guy. I just figure...we're here for about an hour and fifteen...I'm responsible for the musical part of leading our people in worship and the lead pastor is responsible for delivering the spoken word. They sort of fit like hand and glove...why mess that up?

Now...I am taking my role as a pastor more and more serious these days. I see that God has placed me here and has given me a flock to steward. That being said...can I really steward the flock if they never hear my voice. Oh they hear my voice in song...but that's singing. I'm talking about actually pastoring them. Yes, I can pastor people one on one...but once you get to a church of at least a medium size...that ceases to be an option.

My pastor has been pushing me to preach for the past 4 years or so...I finally did so about a month ago. Talking isn't my favorite thing to do. I can do it, but don't really care for it. The more I spent time preparing my message...the more I realized...I really don't like this. I enjoy doing music...I don't enjoy all the "cave" time that is necessary for planning a sermon. And there's something different about practicing your sermon speaking to a wall and sitting down to practice a song on your guitar. You just feel plain weird preaching to a wall. (Though I'm sure that's how it feels on Sunday mornings sometimes!)

Anyhow, I take a vested interest in the people God has given me stewardship over. I want to lead them well. As I look at my role as pastor, I want to know that I am leading our people in every way God has set out for me to do so. Just because talking isn't something I particularly enjoy, doesn't mean I should not do it. However, I think it means that much thoughtfulness should go into what I say...and just like in music; I think the "less is more" rule surely applies for worship pastors. If nothing else...I definitely don't want to talk unless I have something to say.